1599 MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING
Page: 32

but
to write and read comes by nature.
2. Watch. Both which, Master Constable--
Dog. You have. I knew it would be your answer. Well, for your
favour, sir, why, give God thanks and make no boast of it;
and
for your writing and reading, let that appear when there is
no
need of such vanity. You are thought here to be the most
senseless and fit man for the constable of the watch.
Therefore
bear you the lanthorn. This is your charge: you shall
comprehend
all vagrom men; you are to bid any man stand, in the Prince's
name.
2. Watch. How if 'a will not stand?
Dog. Why then, take no note of him, but let him go, and
presently
call the rest of the watch together and thank God you are rid
of
a knave.
Verg. If he will not stand when he is bidden, he is none of the
Prince's subjects.
Dog. True, and they are to meddle with none but the Prince's
subjects. You shall also make no noise in the streets; for
for
the watch to babble and to talk is most tolerable, and not to
be
endured.
2. Watch. We will rather sleep than talk. We know what belongs
to
a watch.
Dog. Why, you speak like an ancient and most quiet watchman,
for I
cannot see how sleeping should offend. Only have a care that
your
bills be not stol'n. Well, you are to call at all the
alehouses
and bid those that are drunk get them to bed.
2. Watch. How if they will not?
Dog. Why then, let them alone till they are sober. If they make
you
not then the better answer, You may say they are not the men
you
took them for.
2. Watch. Well, sir.
Dog. If you meet a thief, you may suspect him, by virtue of
your
office, to be no true man; and for such kind of men, the less
you
meddle or make with them, why, the more your honesty.
2. Watch. If we know him to be a thief, shall we not lay hands
on
him?
Dog. Truly, by your office you may; but I think they that touch
pitch will be defil'd. The most peaceable way for you, if you
do
take a thief, is to let him show himself what he is, and
steal
out of your company.