AS YOU LIKE IT
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hath generally taxed their whole sex withal.

ORLANDO.
Can you remember any of the principal evils that he laid
to the charge of women?

ROSALIND.
There were none principal; they were all like one another
as halfpence are; every one fault seeming monstrous till his
fellow fault came to match it.

ORLANDO.
I pr'ythee recount some of them.

ROSALIND.
No; I will not cast away my physic but on those that are
sick. There is a man haunts the forest that abuses our young
plants with carving "Rosalind" on their barks; hangs odes upon
hawthorns, and elegies on brambles; all, forsooth, deifying the
name of Rosalind: if I could meet that fancy-monger, I would give
him some good counsel, for he seems to have the quotidian of love
upon him.

ORLANDO.
I am he that is so love-shaked: I pray you tell me your remedy.

ROSALIND.
There is none of my uncle's marks upon you; he taught me how to
know a man in love; in which cage of rushes I am sure you are not
prisoner.

ORLANDO.
What were his marks?

ROSALIND.
A lean cheek; which you have not: a blue eye and sunken;
which you have not: an unquestionable spirit; which you have not:
a beard neglected; which you have not: but I pardon you for that,
for simply your having in beard is a younger brother's revenue:--
then your hose should be ungartered, your bonnet unbanded, your
sleeve unbuttoned, your shoe untied, and every thing about you
demonstrating a careless desolation. But you are no such man; you
are rather point-device in your accoutrements, as loving yourself
than seeming the lover of any other.

ORLANDO.
Fair youth, I would I could make thee believe I love.

ROSALIND.
Me believe it! you may as soon make her that you love
believe it; which, I warrant, she is apter to do than to confess
she does: that is one of the points in the which women still give
the lie to their consciences. But, in good sooth, are you he that
hangs the verses on the trees, wherein Rosalind is so admired?

ORLANDO.
I swear to thee, youth, by the white hand of Rosalind, I
am that he, that unfortunate he.

ROSALIND.
But are you so much in love as your rhymes speak?