MUCH ADO ABOUT NOTHING
Page: 51

CLAUDIO.
In most profound earnest; and, I'll warrant you, for the love of
Beatrice.

DON PEDRO.
And hath challenged thee?

CLAUDIO.
Most sincerely.

DON PEDRO.
What a pretty thing man is when he goes in his doublet and hose
and leaves off his wit!

CLAUDIO.
He is then a giant to an ape; but then is an ape a doctor to such
a man.

DON PEDRO.
But, soft you; let me be: pluck up, my heart, and be sad! Did he
not say my brother was fled?

[Enter DOGBERRY, VERGES, and the Watch, with CONRADE and
BORACHIO.]

DOGBERRY.
Come you, sir: if justice cannot tame you, she shall ne'er weigh more
reasons in her balance. Nay, an you be a cursing hypocrite once, you
must be looked to.

DON PEDRO.
How now! two of my brother's men bound! Borachio, one!

CLAUDIO.
Hearken after their offence, my lord.

DON PEDRO.
Officers, what offence have these men done?

DOGBERRY.
Marry, sir, they have committed false report; moreover, they have
spoken untruths; secondarily, they are slanders; sixth and lastly,
they have belied a lady; thirdly, they have verified unjust things;
and to conclude, they are lying knaves.

DON PEDRO.
First, I ask thee what they have done; thirdly, I ask thee what's
their offence; sixth and lastly, why they are committed; and, to
conclude, what you lay to their charge?

CLAUDIO.
Rightly reasoned, and in his own division; and, by my troth, there's
one meaning well suited.

DON PEDRO.
Who have you offended, masters, that you are thus bound to your
answer? this learned constable is too cunning to be understood.
What's your offence?

BORACHIO.
Sweet prince, let me go no further to mine answer: do you hear me,
and let this count kill me. I have deceived even your very eyes: what
your wisdoms could not discover, these shallow fools have brought to
light; who, in the night overheard me confessing to this man how Don
John your brother incensed me to slander the Lady Hero; how you were
brought into the orchard and saw me court Margaret in Hero's
garments; how you disgraced her, when you should marry her. My
villany they have upon record; which I had rather seal with my death