THE ILLUSTRIOUS GAUDISSART
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to make himself a peer of France. When one thinks of that little
Popinot,--ah, mon Dieu! I forgot to tell you that Monsieur Popinot was
named minister of commerce yesterday. Why shouldn't I be ambitious
too? Ha! ha! I could easily pick up the jargon of those fellows who
talk in the chamber, and bluster with the rest of them. Now, listen to
me:--

"Gentlemen," he said, standing behind a chair, "the Press is neither a
tool nor an article of barter: it is, viewed under its political
aspects, an institution. We are bound, in virtue of our position as
legislators, to consider all things politically, and therefore" (here
he stopped to get breath)--"and therefore we must examine the Press
and ask ourselves if it is useful or noxious, if it should be
encouraged or put down, taxed or free. These are serious questions. I
feel that I do not waste the time, always precious, of this Chamber by
examining this article--the Press--and explaining to you its
qualities. We are on the verge of an abyss. Undoubtedly the laws have
not the nap which they ought to have--Hein?" he said, looking at
Jenny. "All orators put France on the verge of an abyss. They either
say that or they talk about the chariot of state, or convulsions, or
political horizons. Don't I know their dodges? I'm up to all the
tricks of all the trades. Do you know why? Because I was born with a
caul; my mother has got it, but I'll give it to you. You'll see! I
shall soon be in the government."

"You!"

"Why shouldn't I be the Baron Gaudissart, peer of France? Haven't they
twice elected Monsieur Popinot as deputy from the fourth
arrondissement? He dines with Louis Phillippe. There's Finot; he is
going to be, they say, a member of the Council. Suppose they send me
as ambassador to London? I tell you I'd nonplus those English! No man
ever got the better of Gaudissart, the illustrious Gaudissart, and
nobody ever will. Yes, I say it! no one ever outwitted me, and no one
can--in any walk of life, politics or impolitics, here or elsewhere.
But, for the time being, I must give myself wholly to the capitalists;
to the 'Globe,' the 'Movement,' the 'Children,' and my article Paris."